Change of Address

Not exactly any more creative but....

rachelandryan.wordpress.com

Hopefully more about the cooking the eating the running the reading and the drinking :) Leave a comment!

New blog soon...

Working on moving to word press. Am a fool for thinking a new layout/venue will motivate me to blog more?

http://rachelandryan.wordpress.com/

Brief

I tried writing a post last week but it became so long winded and was going nowhere. So, a brief update in bullets:

• New job: on my own (off orientation) starting this up coming week. Hopefully people still like me after that (I feel like the girls on the floor can turn pretty quick).
• Running: PR'd twice within 4 weeks on my 5k time. First run was 24:58 (my first sub 25 minute run). Two weeks later I ran a 5k in 24:16. !!!!! (my long winded post was about that 24:16 run. Maybe I'll go back to revisit and revise...)
• Travels: A last minute week-long trip to Paris next week! I've been listening to language podcasts/CDs and really can only say two things. "My name is" and "Would you like to sleep with me?" (pop music has it's educational value).
• Shopping: For the trip to Paris I 'needed' new clothes. mainly dresses (I figure it's more comfortable to wear a dress when you're walking the streets of a city in the middle of summer). I found three dresses, one was an amazing red Theory dress from a consignment shop. With a stain. So, I crossed over to the dark side of crafts and attempted to dye the dress yesterday. More to come on that....
• Good reads: Currently finishing Object of Beauty by Steve Martin. Enjoyed Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks. Read Three Cups of Tea with a grain of salt. One Day (just saw that movie trailer for it last night) is a truly enjoyable, light romantic read that I have on my Kindle. Buy it!

Sorry for the lapse in posting; more to come soon on the dress dyeing adventures!

Turn The Page

I did it! I submitted online applications to two hospitals. That was on a Tuesday or Wednesday. I had the weekend off, but then had two absolutely HORRENDOUS days at work that led to crying and midnight panic attacks. On Wednesday, I was driving home from a yoga class (needed to learn how to breath again), and thinking about calling the hospitals to ensure that they received my applications.

No need as they had called me. Woop woop!

The interview though wasn't until the following monday. At the end of the interview I had a verbal offer ("I like you, the staff likes you, so what shift do you want? Do you want start in two weeks or in 4 weeks?").

Tuesday I had to go in and turn in my two weeks notice and then return to an awkward day of work Wednesday. Some people enjoy working at smaller hospitals because of its size (people know who you are), but I'm not fond of the gossip mill. I was amazed to come in on Wednesday morning to know that nearly everyone knew I was leaving (day AND midnight shift). By the following week people on different floors were aware.

It wasn't until this past Monday (last week) that I signed the papers at my new hospital-which is why I haven't posted anything...I was worried I had turned in my 2 week notice too soon, but no worries (husband didn't mind...he has been wanting me to quit/resign/move on for awhile now).

Orientation at the new hospital has already begun-it's two weeks long! Then I should have about 4 weeks on the floor to get orientated/precepted before being cut loose on my own.

I know the grass isn't always greener on the other side (however a nurse I worked with said it might grow faster and taste better). The grass might be just as brown on the other side. But from what I can tell in orientation (and people in the community), I've made a good step in the right direction.

I'm proud to say that I got a job at this hospital!

Dx Me

With the running club on Sunday, I ran my first ever trail run/race-a 10k Trailblazer run. Having never ran trail, and with a deep seeded fear of being lost in the woods, I planned to run with Katie, a true outdoors girl who has done her share of traveling and climbing.

Good thing, as quite a few people got lost, including Caroline (who has run the course in the past), and a coach with three of her teenage-cross-country runners.

The run started at 1:00pm, which I thought was odd (my life revolves around eating), so I had a larger kind of breakfast of waffles & fruit. at the 12:45, my stomach started growling.

Weather was perfect, 70s and for the most part the course was shaded. We crossed water 3 times (although the third water crossing was more like walking in the river and not across.....). Towards the end of the run I really started getting hungry and may have made the comment, "I think next year I'll volunteer."

And that's when the trail-running-lords slammed me with my negative energy.

We only had maybe 1 mile left.

I was running, and I think the toe box of my left shoe landed on tree root because I remember yelling out in pain; it felt like my toes were being forced up to my shin. Yelled out enough that some running friends stopped to check if I was ok. walked a few steps and continued running again with no problem. no pain whatsoever.

The sloppy run had only just begun. a few minutes later I tripped and fell straight forward kissing dirt. Surprisingly, what hurt at that moment was my shoulder (I guess from my landing on my hands).

We probably finished a few minutes after the tumble.

Our finished time was somewhere around 1 hour 20 minutes (not bad considering we ran an extra loop on the course). My ankle felt ok, that is until an hour or so later when I squatted down to gather my stuff.

So now it's Tuesday. I've iced my ankle maybe 2-3 times a day since Sunday and yesterday I took my first dose of naproxen as well as wrapped my ankle in a bandage. There is no swelling, no bruising. I can move my toes and point my foot up an down. Rotating my foot is painful and doesn't happen very easily. I haven't tried squatting. I can walk, but not as if I was injury free. The front of my ankle is sore to touch with mild pressure.

I haven't called the doctor yet (since there is no swelling, no bruising). Sprain? Strain? How long to stay off running? I really don't want this to be a recurring thing...and I work Wed/thursday of this week (essentially 12 hours on my feet). Thoughts?

Copy Cat

"Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

– Steve Jobs

I totally stole the above quote from D.A.R.

It's a much nicer, wholesome version of my personal mantra that I stole from someone else (I don't remember where:

"Quite whining-make life your bitch"

Now for some seriousness. We all know that my work situation has been less than ideal. My old hospital, if you were selected to orient a new nurse or precept a student nurse, you were first required to attend a preceptorship class. (my current hospital has such a class, however it's only offered maybe two or three times as year...I assume this as the next class isn't until OCTOBER.)

And, I hate to make comparisons, but yet again at my old place of employment your nurse manager or leadership would highly encourage and then push for you to sign up for a charge nurse class.

To learn how to become a charge nurse. Then, you would train with the charge nurse for a few days. And then be charge nurse on your own with some assistance before being let on your own.

Here, again, not so much. I don't even know if there is such a class. But Monday afternoon I was somehow designated in a charge like role, and then on Tuesday I was told by the house supervisor:

"Nurse Director said that you were going to be charge, so I'm not asking, I'm telling you what I was told. You're going to be charge." (and then proceeded to tell me she would hold my hand as needed for the rest of the day.)

So, with an orientee and six patients, I had to take the charge role.

And at one point I had a breakdown at work.

The lady who will One Day Take The Nurse Manager Role (it was announced in January, yet here we are in April and they still won't let her take the job) kept saying to me, "Why don't you want to do this? You're doing great." She then proceeded to give me her favorite cookies that she received on her weekend flight with Delta. She was saving them for herself or her nephew but decided to give them to me for "doing such a great job."

I felt like I should sit, beg, and shake paws.

Why don't I want the charge role:

1. I have six patients.

2. I'm orienting a new nurse.

3. I am still not familiar with hospital policies.

4. I am not sure how to best make assignments.

5. Having just received ACLS certification 4 months ago, I do not feel comfortable running a code.

On both Monday night and Tuesday night I woke up in the middle of night in a panic, tossing turning, and crying hysterically so that I had to leave the bedroom and sleep/cry in a different room to not wake up my husband and hope that a different room would help me sleep.

Wednesday morning I went to a yoga class, and this morning I attended the "yoga for meditation class.' Not sure if I"m suffering from panic attacks, but clearly the point of all this is that

Something Must Change

and

I am the director, the conductor, the author, the coach.

So in the meantime, applications have been submitted, fingers are crossed.

This chapter needs to end.

Weekend Favorite

Saturday: Waffles with blueberries, real maple syrup, coffee, relaxing music, sun, and the newspaper. The only thing missing were the strawberries.

Sunday: Ran 8 miles today with my speedier friend, who told me she was going to 'go it slow.' Her slow is my happy pace (9:15 pace). We ended up meeting a new runner at our turn around point and the pace quickly became an 8:30 pace. Good workout overall-minus the blisters. Then a trip to Publix for the NY Times and fresh produce.....then a day spent with the paper and a tuna/artichoke panini. Now need to make plans for dinner. I'm thinking shrimp, pasta, lemon, shallots, white wine.